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lyrics

Tell me, Lord, oh, tell me, Lord, where am I? – Bleeding, starving, settling.
I’m not Yours but You’re everywhere,
Selling Your cheap dreams which sounded once fair to me.
You liar, pretender, denier.
But the fool am I

Can’t escape from You, My Lord, the One I fear the most.

You drank my tears, swallowed my fear
Then planted the seed of doubt in me.
The gardens of my youth – a deserted, lonesome field.

Denied my truth, stole my dreams, my innermost secret fantasies.
One place You couldn’t take away from me – though worthless as it is.

Can’t escape from You, My Lord, the One I fear the most.

Did you believe in Your own lies, the tales You taught me day by day?
The hopes You choked, night by night
But I believed in You.

Must I depart from the promised land I don’t dare to speak of now?
It’s You who spoilt me word by word,
Who robbed my hopes, who split my soul.

Oh, I can’t escape from You, My Lord, the One I fear the most.
You, You slew me, crucified me, terrified me, Conqueror
Behold.

I can’t shove You out, my demon, I can’t show a better way.
And though You pierced my with Your needles I stood it all each bloody day.

What if I ask the same old questions that You asked me day by day?
Carry on with my own journey, continue on my odyssey.
And if I ever turn around, withdraw from all of Thy decay
Grab a hold again but slip off, take a chance again but fail,
State a last long crying whisper
But the truth remains I can’t.

How can I fill what still empties itself and what will I feel when it’s finally done?
Say, can you save me from exasperation, protect me from thy Kingdom of Fear?
How can I bear this burden upon me, that lack in my chest, that size of my theft?
Say, can you save me from that disgrace
That conquers my dreams, betrays all my prayers,
Dictates all my needs – and smashes them later.
That digs my own grave, say, can you save me from myself.

I can escape from you, my lord, the one I feared the most.

credits

from Why Do You Hate Me With Your Love?, released March 31, 2023

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Nilo Crow Munich, Germany

"Where were you when the Thunder came, the everlasting storm? And when they disappeared again, this nothingness was born.
Your days are dark, your nights are bright – but mine they are both grey."
And so a man walks down the road, with nothing on his mind.
"So who are you?" – and he replies: "I told you, I don't know. I've lost my voice, I've dropped my words, the melody of rain." ... more

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